Reflect – what will you be remembered for?

This blog is for all those self-serving individuals of the world, who more than likely will have no idea this blog is all about them. Which is somewhat ironic given the fact that they think EVERYTHING is about them.

I’m sure there are already people reading this saying, “he’s talking about people like my…(you fill in the blank)”. And that may be true.

But I’m talking about you really…the ones who are so quick to pass judgement on others and rarely, if ever, take a long look in the mirror.

This post all started after I came across this truly humbling quote by Dan Pearce in his book Single Dad Laughing.

“The next time you want to withhold your help, or your love, or your support for another for whatever the reason, ask yourself a simple question: do the reasons you want to withhold it reflect more on them or on you? And which reasons do you want defining you forevermore?” 

I must have read Dan’s quote over and over again at least a dozen times – its message haunted my thoughts hours after first reading it. I was profoundly moved by his question, and frankly so should all of you reading this.

“Do the reasons you want to withhold it reflect more on them or on you?”

Perhaps I’m being a little overly philosophical, but that is one powerful statement. Take a moment and think about the following scenarios:

  • A grandchild who never goes to visit their grandparents because they’re old a feeble.
  • A spouse who makes little to no attempt at a relationship with your family.
  • A friend who always expects events and occasions to be planned around their schedule.
  • A person who offers little in the way of kindness, especially if it’s an inconvenience to them.

Now let’s go back to the question above. “Do the reasons you want to withhold it reflect more on them or on you?”

Wake up my dear readers, it reflects upon you.

If you think for a moment that the people around us don’t notice what’s going on, you’re mistaken. While they may be all smiles in group situations, in private they recognize the hurt, disrespect and uncaring behavior your actions, or lack thereof, are saying.

I readily admit I have my share of faults. And while complaining about things is just part of my nature, at the end of the day I want to be defined by the unselfish acts I’ve given to others – not for hoarding my blessings from them.

Author Colleen Hoover once said, “Selflessness. It should be the basis of every relationship. If a person truly cares about you, they’ll get more pleasure from the way they make you feel, rather than the way you make them feel.” 


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