27Jun 2016 by CJ

Gender stereotypes do not equal parenting

Youth
“There is a time in a boy’s life when the sweetness is pounded out of him; and tenderness, and the ability to show what he feels, is gone.” ― Norah Vincent Working in an office environment can be very enlightening. I’m often amazed at how much people are willing to reveal about themselves – especially regarding stereotypes, which continue to proliferate throughout society. I present the following example. While searching through a library of stock images, I came across a photo of a father and son (who was around 8 years old) walking on a golf course – see photo below. What I perhaps found most compelling about the image was how the father held on to his young son’s hand as they made their way to the next hole.…
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15Jun 2016 by CJ

Enabling others is not helping them

Youth
“You can't save everybody. In fact, there are days when I think you can't save anyone. Each person has to save himself first, then you can move in and help.”  ― Laurell K. Hamilton, Guilty Pleasures I suspect we all are acquainted with someone whose life just seems to be broken. They make one bad decision after another with relationships, finances, careers, you name it! But let me be clear about something – these are not necessarily bad people with no morals or kindness in their hearts. No - they’re just lost, and probably used to being continually enabled by someone else as a means to exist. Beverley Glazer (MA., ICCAC) writes, “There are very fuzzy boundaries between helping and enabling. If you’re enabling, you think that you’re helping, but what you’re…
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19Apr 2016 by CJ

Food is an extension of one’s heart

Love & Relationships, Youth
“If you really want to make a friend, go to someone’s house and eat with him… the people who give you their food give you their heart.” - Cesar Chavez My grandmother loved to cooked. Come to think of it, what she really loved was to feed people. Not unlike other Italian-Americans, she took great pleasure in preparing a feast and then sharing it with someone special. In fact it didn’t matter what time of day it was, if you uttered the words “I’m a little hungry”, she’d be rummaging through the refrigerator or pantry to whip you up something you’d enjoy. I especially appreciated how she always took the time to plan and prepare food items she knew you’d enjoy. Some of my fondest memories of my grandmother were…
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31Mar 2016 by CJ

There’s no room for know-it-alls in life

Life & Living, Youth
“Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.” – PictureQuotes.com First, let me start off by saying the quote above is priceless! Definitely t-shirt worthy. With that in mind, for all those know-it-alls out there (and you know who you are) enough already! It’s getting harder and harder for the humbler beings of this world to sit back and smile while you carrying on with undeserving authority. You might think you’re very well adjusted, but let’s be real – you’ve got issues which cause your know-it-all syndrome. But your issues do not need to become my issues. So what are the schools of thought on know-it-alls? It’s simple really. Diane Barth (LCSW) offers a clear explanation on PsychologyToday.com. There’s an underlying insecurity. When speaking of one of…
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30Mar 2016 by CJ

A trip to the NJ shore – without getting drunk

Youth
Today I was asked a rather interesting and perplexing question. To put it into context, I grew up in New Jersey – not far from the Jersey shore.  The MTV show with the same name did little to boost the reputation of the Garden State, which might explain where this question came from now that I live in Colorado. The question was, “Didn’t you go and get drunk on the boardwalk all the time?” Ah, no. Yes, I did frequent the Jersey shore on numerous occasions. But typically they were to enjoy the sights and sounds of the ocean, a box of salt water taffy and to allow the smells of the sausage and pepper stand and the sea air to take me on nostalgic trip down memory lane. People…
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