The other day, I stumbled upon a song by Christian singer/songwriter Ryan Stevenson. The song is called When We Fall Apart, and it’s a moving tribute to his beloved mother who passed away at age 57 from bone cancer.
Explaining that the lyrics were the last words she spoke to her son he says, “Even in the face of imminent death, she was pouring out wisdom and words of healing and encouragement to me that it’s OK to cry, it’s OK to grieve, it’s OK to fall apart. We are all going to experience loss at some point to some degree. This song has been my way of working through and navigating one of the most painful storms of my life. I hope it encourages you to do the same.”
Here’s the refrain to When We Fall Apart:
It’s ok to cry
It’s ok to fall apart
You don’t have to try
To be strong when you are not
And it may take some time to make sense of all your thoughts
But don’t ever fight your tears
‘Cause there is freedom in every drop
Sometimes the only way to heal a broken heart is when we fall apart
Powerful, powerful words so honestly spoken – uniting us all in a common sorrow we have or will experience at some point in our lives.
Our society tends to encourage everyone from children to the male gender that they should try and suppress their emotions. That’s not a solution, but a defense strategy for those who are emotionally challenged and unwilling to deal with the situation.
There are times in everyone’s life when they will find themselves broken – a pale comparison of their former self and ill-equipped to navigate out of the darkness. We medicate ourselves either pharmaceutically or through other vices such as food, alcohol, even shopping.
But that often does little to resolve the problem, only cover it up further.
As Ryan so beautifully and accurately writes, “sometimes the only way to heal a broken heart is when we fall apart.”
If you’re feeling broken, give yourself permission to fall apart. Scream, yell, cry, whatever you have to do NOT to remain strong when you are not.
There is more strength in recognizing that you’re broken than in concealing all the hurt inside until it eventually destroys you. Let go of the pain, let it run through you like water melted from snow-capped mountains traveling down a slow-moving stream. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to fall apart. It’s all part of healing.
Songwriter: Ryan Stevenson
When We Fall Apart lyrics © Universal Music – Brentwood Benson Publ., Songs Of Emack, Redswan Music