29Feb 2016 by CJ

A birthday lesson in your own backyard

Youth
"Not what we have but what we enjoy constitutes our abundance." - Epicurus This weekend, my neighbor's son celebrated his 5th birthday. Today, birthday celebrations for children five years and under are radically different then the occasions I celebrated decades ago. My parties consisted of a house-full of family and friends, snacks, a cake and maybe a few balloons and party favors. That was it. Now there are "party destinations" for children. You're no longer the "star" of your own birthday - you're sharing the day with dozens of other kids and their families doing the very same thing. To me those aren't the memories birthday celebrations should be all about. So when I saw my neighbor hanging balloons on his mailbox, blowing up a bouncy house in the backyard…
Read More
24Feb 2016 by CJ

Fitting in makes you stand out even more

Youth
“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.” – Kurt Vonnegut The only thing I really remember about being a sophomore in high school was how awful it was. As a shy, chubby, insecure teenager, I longed to fit in with the popular crowd. And so I tried to “be” just like them. I tried to talk the way they did, walk the way they did and even behave the way they did – all in an attempt to be “ordinary” rather than bullied and picked on for being different. The only problem with my game of pretend? That wasn’t me. No matter how hard I tried to fit in, all it really did was make me stand out even more.…
Read More
23Feb 2016 by CJ

Personal perceptions lead to unfair judgements

Youth
“Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.” – Kahlil Gibran “…the attitude you bring to life” “…the way your mind looks at what happens” These are powerful statements which speak directly to someone’s personal perception. Look outside your window and you’ll be amazed to see just how much is going on at any given time. People are living and dying; loving and suffering; at peace and at war.  Yet through it all, everyone’s perception of this life is unique - regardless of their position in society. Sadly, perceptions often lead to judgements, which then lead to prejudices, and…
Read More
22Feb 2016 by CJ

Judgements are not just for others, but for ourselves

Life & Living, Youth
“We should be rigorous in judging ourselves and gracious in judging others.” – John Wesley What does it say about a person who’s quick to judge and condemn others, but rarely turns the magnifying glass on themselves? I’m guilty as charged I’m afraid – to some extent we all are. Far too often, my high ideals leave me in continually judgement when they aren’t met by those closest to me. I have no more right to judge others on what’s right or wrong than anyone else in this world, and yet it’s so easy to fall into that trap day in and day out. I sometimes wonder if we’re afraid to pass judgement on ourselves – afraid to see the inequities and insecurities that live deep within us all. For…
Read More
11Feb 2016 by CJ

Effective communication, is it really that hard?

Life & Living, Youth
“Every word has consequences. Every silence, too.” – Jean-Paul Sartre There’s a delicate balance which exists in the way we communicate. Some people lack a social filter – often saying whatever comes to their mind with little consideration of how those words might affect other people. Others are more comfortable staying silent – possessing a relevant and many times astute opinion, but refusing to share it with anyone around them. The place to be is somewhere in the middle really. Telling someone who spent much of the day preparing a meal from scratch that it wasn’t very good is not a constructive use of words (or a suggested reaction for newly married couples trying to impress their spouse). Sitting by idly with no opinion or feedback when someone is seeking…
Read More